Monday, June 9, 2014

On Lying Lester Possessing A Smarterphone

Yes, you read that right... Lying Lester does not own a "smart phone", Lying Lester owns a SMARTERphone. Why? Because a regular smartphone would seem dumb to someone as super-intelligent as Lying Lester.

You think you're brainy enough to own a smarterphone? Tough titties, YOU can't buy one. Why? Because they are not for sale to the general public. *If* you're smart enough you'll get an invite to purchase one.

It's like possessing a American Express Centurion card (AKA "the Black Card"). This is a credit card you must be invited to apply for. Same thing with the smarterphone. Lying Lester was recognized for his superior intellect and invited to purchase a smarterphone.

And let me tell you, it's as if this thing was from the future. Totally voice controlled, able to project holograms, etc. Unfortunately I'm not allowed to disclose all the features of this top secret phone, but let me assure you that you'd be totally blown away if you knew what it could do.

But you never will, as you will never be invited to own one. By the way, the smarterphone, despite it being a technological wonder from the future (literally), still can't seem to catch all of Lying Lester's typos (of which I am quilty of making quite a few). Such is life, I guess.

Byline: This genious level commentary was produced via the superior mind of Lord Lying Lester: Man of Reason (AKA Lester Nation). Purveyor of smartness. LLIN-083.


  1. You are correct regarding your "quiltiness" in the typo department, Lester (or word salad department). As for your "smarterphone", I say you are full of sh!t. As usual.

  2. Son,its time to leave your fantasy world and seek professional help.

  3. Who does sChumckeford think is his "son"? Is it me, or is it dErvy?