Sunday, March 30, 2014

Lester Nation The Proud Mental Masturbator

In regards to my joke blog, rAtional nAtion uSA, I'd like to clue my readers into a hearty ha-ha that I recently pulled at the expense of the blogger I like to call "Dervo". Or, a joke is what I've decided to call it. In actuality I screwed up when I referred to Dervo as someone who engages in "mental masturbation". Turns out I didn't know what "mental masturbation" means.

I should have looked up the term before using it, because, as it turns out, I used it incorrectly. That is egg on my face, no doubt. Given that I've been using the term so much recently, it occurred to me (after typing it for the umpteenth time) that I wasn't positive I had the definition correct. Well, after a Google search I found out that "mental masturbation" really refers to "intellectual activity that serves no practical purpose".

Huh. Now that I've looked it up, it REALLY sounds like "mental masturbation" applies to my pursuit of the teachings of the great philosopher, Ayn Rand. As well as my entire political outlook. I mean, I voted for Gary Johnson in the last election, a dude that received less than one percent of the popular vote and absolutely zero electoral votes. I spent a lot of time talking up Mr. Johnson on RNUSA and on other blogs. "Hop aboard the liberty train and see where it takes you", I said.

Yeah, I rationalized my Johnson-ballot-casting by claiming that if enough people voted for my man Gary it would build the momentum for a viable, strong, and vibrant Libertarian Party. But did that happen? NO! It was all a complete waste of time given that Mr. Johnson had no chance - and still has - no chance at all of ever being elected president. And also given the fact that the Libertarian Party always has been, and will likely always remain a fringe Party and ideology.

Reading, studying and proselytizing in regards to the teachings of Ayn Rand is undoubtedly a huge waste of time as well. If that isn't "mental masturbation", I don't know what is. Given that fact, I feel a heartfelt apology from me to Dervo is quite rightly in order. I had no right what-so-ever of accusing this fine blogger of wasting his time with his excellent blog Sleeping with The Devil.

While it is true that all the rEpublicans and many of the dEmocrats (including the pResident) could certainly be described as Conservative, it is also true that the Progressive caucus is the largest Congressional caucus. Therefore, the "intellectual activity" that Dervo engages in on his blog might actually serve a purpose, in that there are members of Congress that are of a like mind as this outstanding blogger, whereas I am in disagreement with the totality of all members of our federal government. Even Libertarians like Rand Paul, who one might think I'd be an admirer of... I am in strong disagree with him as well on most issues.

So, should I allow the fact that the chances that my political philosophies are ever instituted in Washington are absolutely bupkus get me down? I was using "mental masturbation" in a derogatory sense when I applied it to Dervo, after all. One might think I'd abandon Objectivism and Libertarianism given how completely useless my pursuit of them are.

But, NO! Mental masturbation in pursuit of the truths expounded upon by the great philosopher may serve no practical purpose, but I will continue to mentally masturbate in pursuit of these truths nonetheless. Fact is, in this regard I am a PROUD mental masturbator! Some may view this stance as illogical and irrational... and I completely agree with them!

So... in conclusion: I, Lying Lester am proud to be an irrational mental masturbator... just like my hero, the great philosopher, Ayn Rand. If you're mentally masturbating on the subject of Rand, that is good. If you're mentally masturbating in regards to any other intellectual activity - say, pRogressivism - that is definitely bad. And, while the pRogressive caucus is large, they are largely ineffective. So take that Dervo!

Byline: This 4th LLIN commentary was authored by Lord Lying Lester: Man of Reason (AKA Lester Nation). Purveyor of Untruth. LLIN-004.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Restoring Comments deleted by Ed Degorio #6

    Ed Degorio [April 4, 2014 at 11:51 AM]

    Jealous aren't you Devious, because I can masturbate and you wish that you could do it for me. Caught you again.

  3. RN thinks I want to masturbate him? What a sicko!